5 states of consciousness as a human being

http://www.lifepositive.com/Mind/philosophy/life/meaningless-life.asp

Came across this article- it is interesting what the writer says about the 5 states of consciousness. I think in life you are usually surrounded by many people in state 1 or 2. I understand myself to be in state 2 growth from what I can understand from the text. How about you, fellow INFPs? It would be great if you have different responses to this. I would like to understand what it means to understand life in state 3,4,5…

As a summary:

State 1: You are responsible is the first level of consciousness, where the individual holds others responsible for everything in life. Accusingly, his fingers are always pointing outwards, fixing blame, complaining. He’s a perpetual victim and believes in concepts like ’survival of the fittest’, ‘there isn’t enough for all of us’, ‘life is a struggle’, and ‘everything is fair in love and war’.

State 2: The second level of consciousness is: We are responsible. The individual understands and acknowledges that he has also been contributing to events around him. He accepts that the finger pointing outwards accusing others also means that three fingers were pointing towards him. Accepting his role in the state of affairs, he begins forgiving people for what they are and what they have done. He becomes more accommodative, lenient and compassionate. The journey from outside to inside has begun.

State 3: As the realization deepens, the third level of consciousness arises: I am responsible. He realizes that the outside world is an ‘occurring’ one. Three people have three different reactions ranging from ‘in favor’, ‘against’ to ‘indifferent’ or a combination of these three. The thought arises that our life is not about unfolding events, but about our relationship with events that shapes subsequent events. The same event can be perceived as an opportunity or a threat depending on our viewpoint. And this viewpoint depends on our conditioning.

State 4: In the fourth level of consciousness, in accomplishment there is no aggression to stamp one’s personal authority on an event, and in failure there is no escapism through blame or vanity. Here, the individual is not responsible—there’s just no one left to be responsible. All events become a happening through and around an individual. The individual becomes a ‘witness’ of the events in the outer world and the occurrence of thoughts, emotions and sensations in the inner world, witnessing the actions automatically happening through the mind-body organism.

State 4/5: In the fourth and fifth levels of consciousness, life has no purpose, no goals, no ambitions, no agenda, nothing to accomplish, nowhere to reach, nothing to become. Life is lived in the now, in the moment, spontaneously, in full acceptance.
Life becomes empty and meaningless. In this emptiness one experiences fulfillment, in themeaninglessness one experiences wholeness. This article is a conceptual presentation. Do not accept it, do not reject it. Investigate and enquire how valid it is. And question: does it have the ring of truth?

A Passion Test

I took a passion test a few months back. It’s a list of sorts, where you write down everything to: “15 things I would love to do/be/have in life”. Not too hard right? The trick is to compare them against each other- you have to be truthful to yourself- and you leave out the choice you can do without.

For example:
1) I would like to travel around the world
2) I want to be a science professor
3) I have great friends surrounding me

You would compare statement 1: ” I would like to travel around the world” with statement 2: ” I want to be a science professor” and decide which one you cannot live without. In this case, maybe you rather travel than be a professor. So you cancel out statement 2.

1) I would like to travel around the world
2) I want to be a science professor

Then you compare statement 1 with statement 3: “I have great friends surrounding me”. Say you rather have great friends who love and support you. Then you cancel statement 1.

1) I would like to travel around the world
2) I want to be a science professor
3) I have great friends surrounding me

You go on and compare the rest of the 15 statements. At the end, you pick the top 5 statements (its like surviving audition rounds). These are really your purpose statements; these things matter to you in life more than the rest.

My top 5 statements came out like this:
1)Feel good in body & health
2)Have a best friend/love
3)I accept and embrace challenges and change
4)I feel inspired and passionate about my work
5)Travelling with the person I love dearly

The other 5:
6)Writing the best poetry from my heart and mind
7)I can inspire myself and people around me
8)Work at the forefront of knowledge
9)Work with passionate talented people
10)Travel the world
11)Have a life of serenity and beauty

It has helped me to narrow down my focus in life and what needs to be achieved now. The idea is know what kind of future you would like to create for yourself. I realised that what sort of work I do isn’t so important as to whether I am inspired and passionate about it… rather idealistic, will have to see how it all fits in. The statements can change, so you are advised to do it maybe every 6 months. Sometimes when goals are fulfilled, you will have other new goals. These are rather infp statements..

First born gets the anxiety and heart attacks

I am a first born. Sometimes they descriptions of INFP do not resonate with me because admittedly, I am not as good nor kind as the descriptions.

Read some of the descriptions of first born.. highlighted the ones that I thought were me:

First born children are welcomed into a tightly primped environment riddled with elevated standards and high expectations. New parents are attentive, proud and well-read. They take a roll of pictures a day, buy only the finest diapers and don’t let a single achievement go unnoticed. All of this can have a very positive effect on a first born child. These children often develop a diverse vocabulary at an early age, are independent, strong-willed and able to adapt easily to many situations. First born children are known to be highly organized and eager to please (probably a result of the constant attention they received as youngsters). They are often excellent leaders, as well, pursuing careers in education, entertainment, politics and entrepreneurship.

Children can also be negatively affected by being first born. Amateur parents’ inevitable anxiety can often seep into a first born, resulting in a lifetime of worry and self-consciousness. Secondly, first born children often take on the role of “Peace Maker”—attempting to resolve familial problems. They mediate and abstain from initiating more conflict as to avoid disappointing their parents. This can lead to perpetual passive-aggressiveness. First born children also tend to be over-achievers and can be greatly discouraged by perceived failures relating to school, career or personal relationships.

Growing up, my mother and grandmother treated me pretty fairly. However, family never told me I was a good kid (had to hear it from teachers and relatives) and my dad is always telling me I am the most awful person on earth. Since young, I’ve always been anxious to please, to do right, to score good grades. In my case, however, my parents barely acknowledged. Seems ridiculous that I continued in this vein of ‘trying so hard to please by grades’ way up until my teens. But I had wonderful encouraging teachers who acknowledged my effort.

To this day, I feel any gain I get: respect, money, love, friendship: is largely conditional on my own efforts. While it does make me try harder than most people, I find it hard to sometimes acknowledge that there are factors outside my control, and I cannot force decisions.

I also feel that rare is the relationship where the love and respect is unconditional. I feel that people are unpredictable and selfish with their love. My world view is ‘co-dependent, conditional’ but other people may be ‘autonomous, generous’, which is hard for me to understand.

For me to be in a love relationship- I must feel the other person is mutually responsive (not possible, and stems from selfish ‘conditions’ set from me), or has unconditional love OR// respect for me. I don’t like being in love because it makes me all neurotic, out-of-control. Religion has helped me to see a bit that if God loves me pretty much, other people shouldn’t matter…

I has a money. What I do wif it

Just being silly. No. This post is a rather non-infp topic really. Those here who trawl the infp forums know that the frequent infp topics are usually relations with other types or career issues or the purpose of life. I mean, see for yourself here: INFP General Discussion

My thoughts in the past few months have been leading me towards attaining financial knowledge for myself. It’s not something that is taught in school; and one would be lucky if they had parents who would be able to explain financial issues like debt, mortgage, education, rent, investing and savings to them. The world of finance and business was like a black hole in my knowledge of the world. Finding myself pretty deficient in this area, I have been reading up. Frankly, it has been tough wading through the staggering amount of info out there on how to make your money work for you.

Fortunately, my matter is simplified cause I have so little cash on hand. No way I could invest in property or high risk ventures: so all that remains is:

1) savings deposits (depending on the interest rate you can get)
2) my own small business
3) education in the form of a degree
4) vocational education that can contribute to future side income: e.g. consulting, educating, sewing, baking, hair-cutting
5) investment in funds (small amounts)
6) foreign exchange (small amounts)
7) online income?

I have just started a financial course on investing… hopeful some good results soon.

My goal would be to be one day be financial independent and knowledgeable, and not to worry as I am currently, on day-to-day expenses, of which 80% of my current income is going to. The more immediate reason is that my parents have a problem with me living with them (even as I pay the rent)- or to put it more succinctly, my dad can’t stand me and wants me out in 2 weeks.

I’m quite resigned to the above fact: since he has repeatedly said it over the course of my entire life. (that he can’t stand me) I know I have been probably been difficult / vice versa and its an issue of personality clashes. (dad is an ESTJ who has health problems.) As far back as I remember, I have always been the one targeted, the one who he can always emotionally bully into a reaction. I get along with him some days, but I never trust him for this reason. One moment he’s my 57 year old dad, the next moment he’s a stupid 5 year old schoolyard bully who can’t control his feelings.

People who have dads whose emotions are largely stable will not understand unless I record a video of his 3-5 hour monologue tirades.

I’m not giving him the pleasure of me leaving in 2 weeks. I don’t see any logical reason to. I’m giving myself a 1 year timeline to save/invest enough cash to further my education, or should I change my mind, to be able to back up myself for at least 1 year. Living on my own before was mentally and emotionally liberating and one of the best things I did for myself. But it was hard to do it for too long as I did not have a long term financial plan for it.

This time, should I leave, I’m determined to go off and not come back home to stay again. It’s a case of they are my family, but we just can’t stand each other at close quarters. Things are better when parents understand they cannot control you.

Perfect song for an INFP

It’s just awful to be an INFP sometimes. All that Fi and no outlet. That’s why my blog is ’surviving INFP’ not ‘celebrating INFP’. SIGH. Let’s sing Karaoke.

How do you cool your lips
After a summer’s kiss
How do you rid the sweat
After the body bliss
How do you turn your eyes
From the romantic glare
How do you block the sound
Of a voice you’d know anywhere

How do you numb your skin
After the warmest touch
How do you slow your blood
After the body rush
How do you free your soul (sigh)
After you’ve found a friend
How do you teach your heart (Big Sigh)
It’s a crime to fall in love again (ARGGGGGHHHHHH!!! crashes head into wall)

Oh, I really should have known
By the time you drove me home
By the vagueness in your eyes
Your casual good-byes
By the chill in your embrace
The expression on your face
That told me
Maybe You might have some advice to give
On how to be
Insensitive (EXACTLY!)
Insensitive (that might be a skill worth learning)
Insensitive

Oh, you probably won’t remember me
It’s probably ancient history
I’m one of the chosen few
Who went ahead and fell for you (stupid)
I’m out of hope, I’m out of touch (very)
I fell too fast, I feel too much (stupid x 2)
I thought that you might have
Some advice to give on how to be
Insensitive
I really should have known
By the time you drove me home
By the vagueness in your eyes
Your casual good-byes
By the chill in your embrace
The expression on your face
That told me
Maybe You might have some advice to give
On how to be
Insensitive
Insensitive
Insensitive

Childhood friends

Childhood friends. They are people who saw you from the pov of a 7 year old. They remembered you differently. You remembered them differently. You lost touch, then 20 years later you call each other up, after seeing each other faces in facebook and having gotten curious about their lives.

I feel that, the past was a great common point. But reality exists now, for me to understand this strange creature, sitting across from me, all grown up, similar yet disimilar. It’s time to learn about those missing years, not to reminiscence how the person before was so thin/nice/happy/sweet. That childhood friend was great for that period of time that I knew her. However, if I am unable to see the adult that has grown over the same soil, i am in danger of projecting my own needs for comfort (sameness) which is akin to some disrespect.

I wonder, how did you ease the transitional period of getting back with childhood friends? Did most of these friendships turn out to be worth it from your pov?

Happily planning for a new career

First post of the year! Sorry, couldn’t bring myself to post about my deary life as an cubicle slave..

In a way, was really trying to get my house in order, cause when you get to my age, you realise you can’t just coast on goodwill and temporary jobs. You need to find out where you intend to drive your life towards. My current job is possibly the worst job (to one) I have ever done. I was not reading intuitively(Ne) into the situation at the interview and settled for what my logic(Te) and poor emotional judgement(Si-Fi?) told me was the right choice.

If it wasn’t for a new colleague at my workplace, I would have pretty much meandered directionlessly for a few more months. He helped me see that the situation for me was highly uncomfortable and that I had lost my direction.

It took me about another month to resolve issues that were always questions in my head. Issues of how creatives here (in my area) are underpaid, overworked- and the fear that would kill any joy I have for the job. I kept searching for an answer to that. I went to a seminar in a school where they were offering a bachelor in film; and the lecturer said something randomly to the effect: “If you want to earn lots of money, then this line isn’t suitable for you, people are here because of their passion. If you believe in your passion, you can do anything.”

It seemed he was intuitively reading the anxieties of the audience. How did he know what I was thinking..!?

Still, I didn’t quite believe in the hype of following your passion. I think somewhat cynically sometimes its a way to say to creatives, “Since you enjoy your work so much, there’s no need for me to pay you that much.” Scary thought.

Reviewing my life, I tried to find out why I was not so keen to be in the film industry. Do I not like film enough? No, it seemed I liked lighting and directing enough. But I disliked producing and editing- because of their sheer tediousness for the former and mind-numbing crushing isolation for the latter. Even though being female ensured that I would mostly likely get into these 2 jobs; I didn’t want to do something I disliked.

While searching in the pile of laundry that was my pseudopassions (painting, writing, sewing, baking), I stumbled on an old old passion of mine. Something that has consistently made me happy doing it. Something I loved talking about. I remember the first time I held a SLR (Nikon FM10) in school and it made me giddy with joy. I remember always being curious about photographers’ and cameramens’ work. I remember always looking at light once I learnt about film lighting in school. I also remember the mixed feelings when I destroyed 3 rolls of black and white film while developing film (and almost swore photography was not for me). I also remember the awful feeling of taking some really gorgeous photos in club (14years) and realising I had not loaded the film properly at the end of the trip. That really broke my heart. I knew they were great. I remember shooting ‘projects’ with a compact camera at age 12. I remember telling my ex-boss I wanted to learn photography lighting from him. I remember going abroad with my company and being pleasantly surprised to see 3 female camera assistants. (that changed my view about women in photography jobs). Most of all, I am always hit by green-eyed envy when photographers talk about their photography jobs and show me their professional photos (like: I could/wanna do that too!).

I know I want to be a photographer now. I was afraid of being a female in this line for the longest time. I still think some people will not give you much chances if you are female (because they are afraid of asking you to lift stuff and whatnot) . But I think I can convince them through sheer hardworkingness and some smarts, once they can be convinced to hire me just once. That would take learning, education, training, mentorship, freelancing work, gym training(haha) to eventually get somewhere. I want to practise and practise. I want to be my own boss. I’m putting down my plans now..learning driving, looking for short courses. I don’t even have a DSLR. I’m getting a temp loan from my family. I’m looking for mentors.

But I’m really happy now I have a direction and passion I want to follow …:) Yay for me..!

Any tips for me, since i’m not even an amateur(not even a dslr), would be much appreciated.

My workplace types?

I’m just sitting around entertaining myself, typing my workmates and bosses.

Bosses- ISTJ, ESTP, ESFP, ISTP
Colleagues – xSTP , ENTJ, ESFJ, ESFP, ISFP, ESFP, INTJ

I get along with the INTJ best although he’s far far older than me, and I feel I don’t know the rest. I’m wondering if this is a horrible place to be in with only one ‘IN’? My ex-bosses were INTJ and ENFJ in comparison; and that was almost the best place I ever worked in…

Currently the ESFJ is giving me problems. Just wondering how do I wander around in this maze? I feel this is like high school hell all over again….

RUN??????

Being Depressed: You can’t snap out of it.

This post might explain why I’ve been so negative these months… I don’t know

I think I’m slightly depressed. I feel like apologising for it, i don’t know why. Maybe because I don’t feel like blogging because of it. But I do owe the world to come out of my hermit hole once in a while.

Crying shame
The final straw came yesterday when I started crying twice in the workplace toilet for no good reason. I just sat in the cubicle telling myself this was crazy, and to stop it, yet I felt like all mixed-up, anxious, angry and upset. I had been trying to get well after getting sick with flu recurrently for the past 3 months. Been taking my supplements, tried to watch funny movies (I felt down the minute I walked out of the theatre where moments before I was laughing), exercised (the good effects did not last past an hour), ate chocolate, basically everything I could really do to maintain an even keel on life.

Depression is not something that you can snap out of. And I think I have been mildly so for many months. Except I only just realised it was depression.

Medic…
I had to see a doctor. My social life was suffering, because I was sick and did not want to do anything but lie in bed after work. I could work and function, but I could not be social and light-hearted. I had become quite angry recently over trivial things, and could hardly bear being near crowds or callous people.

So I walked into a clinic after work yesterday. I wondered what the receptionist would think. I didn’t look sick to myself. I sat and stared at the posters on the walls until they called my name.

The doctor was really young. But he was very kind – when I told him I thought I was depressed, he said he was sorry to hear that, and listened and took notes while I poured out my frustration at being depressed for ‘no good reason’. He suggested I see a psychologist or counsellor and wrote me a recommendation. It was really nice of him. He also mentioned that one of the signs of depression was trying to avoid going out with friends. (I didn’t know that). I also asked him for some pills to tide over for the short-term, just so I could function at work without trying to throw things around.

Of course, he had to warn me that anti-depressants were addictive. I did not myself want to set myself down the path of addiction, so I let him understand that it was the short term until maybe the combined effects of supplements, exercise kicked in. Maybe I should also take his advice and see a counsellor.

I do feel I also need a good vacation soon. Perhaps a yoga vacation amidst lush greenery or just a nice hotel stay anywhere with a couple of good books and internet might do me some good. I just want to enjoy being alive again.

Job update: believe in indications

I’m not enjoying my job that much.

For those who believe in indications, follow them.

Good indications=Good job!
One thing that my last job should have thought me was: go with first impressions and gut feelings. I got a job that I loved because of that. The people were nice, the office had a ‘Zen quality’, the interviewer liked me (vice versa) and I was there early.

Bad indications= uh-oh…
My current job had all the bad first impressions: delayed interview, slow callback (I had to pester them for an answer because another job was waiting in the wings) , lower pay, long distance. Yet I took it because of perceived advantages for my career. My interviewers liked me though.

The other job offered: was there just on ‘time’, quick callback, higher pay, very short distance. The interview went alright. Work outside my career choice.

I’m not sure anymore.
Currently, I feel like my job is a step-back, a reverse in responsibilities. I put in 150% from start to end on other people’s projects. I used to only put in 80% effort and things got done nicely. I don’t have a proper job responsibility that I can oversee independently. My colleagues are friendly enough, but I’m an assistant to them. I’m a bit demoralised. I feel like one of those office drones. I don’t believe this is somewhere I’ll put roots down- but hopefully whatever doesn’t kill me, makes me stronger. Maybe I should put a little more initiative in mapping my own career too.

sigh. Meanwhile, I have my flu and cold to deal with. Excuse my miserable entry.

Conversations with fellow types

Conversations in RL
I hate awkward silences. Which is why I tend to like people whom are the equivalent of a jackpot; you toss in a few words, and they end up talking while you take the chance to down a few drinks; all the while nodding sagely. And they even thank you for listening.

Maybe because of my choice of company, I rarely get to put a word in edgewise. It can sometimes be very one-sided and depressing to be someone’s soapbox. Still, it beats sitting quietly in a room, listening to a clock ticking away and you and your company (isfj or istjs types usually) sweating silently for a conversation point. You start fantasizing about being invisible. It’s different with ‘N’ quiet types.. you know everyone is just spacing out usually.

Conversations with ‘IN’s
Recently, through a friend of mine, I got to meet up with some of her pals after a theatre show. Strangely, my friend, an INTP, introduced the topic of personality profiles- that revealed that one of her pals who had been sitting quietly listening in, was an INFP. Very interesting. I never met a revealed ‘INFP’ and found myself curious. She had a very feminine style and was rather religious. Another one of her pals, whom I always thought was interesting- was an INFJ. She had a very young and open mind, and liked to question any convictions we had. The INTP and INFJ were both free-thinkers.

It was a very interesting mix because I never once had a conversation with so many ‘IN’s. Usually, you might have a conversation with a fellow IN but there would be someone in the group badgering for a change in topic. There wasn’t so many pragmatic issues being discussed- we talked about everything, anything under the sky. The conversations reminded me of the many idealistic things I wanted to do with my life. It was nice.

Love as a psychic force

(I am convinced this is probably the most whimpy-sounding title you can give to an blog entry bar a title like ‘Loser’… )

I’m not one of the nicest people on earth- there are days, squashed up twixt smelly armpits and shoving, bedraggled freaky hair women on public transport (you know the ones that tickle you with their hair across your arm) – I feel like doing psychic damage to all the people around in my mind-reel. Very self-destructive, I know.

I learnt recently that such feelings of personal hate or disgust towards others will not get the desired effect: for them to move away or leave you alone. In fact, you might be just steeping yourself in your own bile. Building a moat filled with rotten muck is likely to leave you more alone- but people who want to get to you will attempt all means, even to destroy this false sense of security. Not being able to protect yourself makes you feel more vulnerable… and I think nobody wants that.

Love as a Psychic Force
It was in a relationship book for lovers that I found a very simple idea: the idea that you use love as a psychic force to improve relationships. Sort of like ‘love your enemies’ – but not like doing things for them- rather, like being a ‘goodwill ambassador’.

Loving someone you are angry with is hard work
I told myself to give it a try someday, never expecting that it would be really hard. The first time was when I started this new job- I did everything enthusiastically, had fun and ended the day on a high note. Then I received this phone call from my manager. She asked me how was my day- being naive, I prattled on happily. She then said ominously that she had something to tell me- that my supervisor felt I had offended her and disrespected her seriously.

I heard this phone call on a train- and the moment she mentioned that- I felt my heart drop in anger and my eyes tear up. It took all my control to speak quietly and end the conversation. Flashes of anger, things like ‘how dare she..’, of quitting and shouting over the phone boiled in my head. Then this same idea that I read popped up and stood in the corner of the room like a big pink elephant. I couldn’t possibly ignore it.

It seemed right, but I was resisting it- because instead of burning her (actually 2- the manager and supervisor) in fire and brimstone, I had to send her love. It was like pushing the same elephant back into a small hat. (You’ll understand once you try it. )

Being a conduit for love.. and forgiving
Nothing at first. Running on empty. I tried again, this time I tapped into the love outside of me.. and there -whoosh- my heart ran over with love and forgiveness. I felt teary as I directed the love from the universe, telling her, ‘I forgive you, you are loved’. It was like I was a conduit for love.. but I was also cathartically emptied of hate and love.

It’s very difficult to put these feelings in words- what happened was that I called both of them later, explained myself, made a simple apology. I saw in the next few weeks a positive change in their attitudes towards me, though I did little to improve the perception. Since that time I have tried this method variously with difficult family members and colleagues, inexplicably -without much effort-they all seemed to treat me better, even being really nice. It befuddles me that such a thing would work, but it seems to. I could explain it away rationally, but that would be ignoring what a mystery love is.

What do you think..?

Burnt out

I must be going through one of those bad days again. Been feeling a way which can be best summed up as “missing God”. Some people can work weekends. I’m one of those types that can’t. Feeling very burnt out from not having a quiet silent day for myself. Even though I took the day off today and spent most of my time on the internet, I keep getting distracted by parents trying to get me to watch tv with them, have meals together or do some chores. Sleeping in was a bad move, cause I got woken up by jets blasting the sonic barrier in the sky. So much for my day off.

One of my fantasy of a day of revolves around the idea of everyone being asleep except for myself for 24 hours. No noises from cars, alarm clocks, ringing telephones, blaring tvs, loud conversations. All you hear is the soothing tick-tock of the clock as you wake up, butter your toast, read the papers, even do your laundry.

This is a scenario that hardly ever happens at my house. My father is an introvert, so he leaves me alone. But my mum is an extrovert, and she always wants company. Which is why I love to stay up from 2am to 6am.. my own witching hours. To be honest, I don’t know if my low threshold of annoyance can be attributed to noise or my current spiritual barrenness. All I know is I love to be in a place right now where the clocks go tick-tock and a warm balmy breeze blows..

Bloody Fi-Si working overtime again.

This is bloody Fi-Si working overtime again. Stuff I wrote, while in the office, bored to tears with the easy work. This is after all only my 2nd week. No creative Ne stuff to do, and no Te excel work or information searching available. I imagine holding a cigarette, smoking moodily in these times- though I hardly ever smoke. Sigh… I think I’m gonna to have to start inventing something to do soon.

“loneliness is an animal. you feed it, you walk it. it becomes a source of energy, identified as your own. You hardly worry about being alone. yet, loneliness is an insidious conniving pet. it has become a source of self- soothing. INFPs look around them and they cannot find anyone they can call in spirit, friends, buddy, lovers. Few and far between. Surrounded by people they cannot speak to. They feel so deeply but nothing ever shows on their faces.”

Ne (extraverted intuition) for INFPs

Been wondering what is Ne exactly for INFPs, seems like I hardly come across any good observations of Ne. I would guess Ne comes about as problem solving: “i have an idea, let’s convert this computer screen into a fish tank” aka hacker style, or inferring multiple meanings in poetry in Fi-Ne mode:). Extroverted, intuition would be very playful, keen on monty pythonquese jokes. I once had a ESFJ friend, whose Ne would often emerge and between both of us, we could always make rude funny connections with people’s dressing and their comic intention that would escalate to heights of ridiculous hilarity.

Ne would also make me daydream about connections: I would take a bus and start thinking about India all because I was thinking of yoga, > because I was thinking of happiness>because I was thinking of some kids I knew>because I was thinking about the art lesson I just gave> because I was looking at my watch. So is this how Ne works..? Your POV appreciated.

From an infj? perspective: http://infjorinfp.blogspot.com/2006/06/infp-philosophy.html
• Inferring
• Hypothesizing
• Seeing possibilities
• Wondering and brainstorming
• Emergent
“This is what might be.”
“It could be this or this or this or . . .”

AND
When Ne is a preferred process…
• Much reading “between the lines” occurs.
• Potential possibilities and meanings are “revealed” and must be explored.
• You feel fully engaged in emerging new approaches to doing things and are energized by discovering other perspectives in an ever-shifting succession of ideas or insights triggered by the particular situation, much like brainstorming.
• You frequently experience a flight of ideas that brings relevant pieces of information from one context into another.
• “What is” is not seen for what it is but for its relationship to other things.
• Everything is perceived in a context of a web of relationships. Nothing stands alone or is disconnected.

From an infp perspective (this is very good.. found myself laughing…and probably the most enlightening description that I found so far:):
http://infp.globalchatter.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?t=6153&-what is Ne
You could think of an INFP’s Ne as a loyal servant who walks the perimeter of the grounds carrying a lantern before it and with a guard dog by its side. Maybe the guard dog is Te. The Ne is the face that greets visitors at the door like a butler. Ne checks the gates and doors, and secures the windows. It ensures that its master isn’t disturbed in doing his important work in the study, and it dutifully brings the dominant what it needs whenever called.

I’ll just add that Ne the servant sometimes takes his job so seriously that he wanders off the grounds following the tracks of an animal that might be dangerous and picks up scat to bring back to the master, but Ne gets easily distracted and follows another track that crossed the original track. This tracking goes on and on, and the servants backpack gets overloaded with specimens…but miraculously in what seems like aimless wandering it ends up back at its master house. Tired, Ne goes back inside satisfied at having done a good job, gives the specimens to the master and goes to the Ne’s sleeping quarters.

Si is the master’s personal secretary who never leaves the house, and with Ne tired out Si takes over some of the servant’s duties. When someone knocks at the door, Si responds in fear and uncertainty double-bolting the door. Si runs up to tell the master that their is a horrible monster lurking outside, and they try to decide whether to sic the Te dog on the potential intruder. They both cower huddled together in the study frozen in inaction.

Ne wakes up, goes downstairs and answers the door. It turns out it was just a girl scout selling cookies. Ne politely buys some cookies and brings them up to the master’s study with two glasses of milk. The Fi master says he wasn’t afraid and that he was just about to take care of the problem himself.

For a deeper description: http://greenlightwiki.com/lenore-exegesis/Extraverted_Intuition

Facial expression of Introvert Intuitives (infp,intp,intj,infj)

I lurrve youtube. It’s the first thing I google when I’m bored. That and ‘what to do, I am bored.’

Looking at these videos: I think i’m getting some ideas on how types behave (*ignored the content of their speech)… The videos on INFPs were pretty fun to watch. I do hope the first girl is really an INFP too, cause that’s pretty much how my face behaves…(the thinking eye roll, shrug, half smile). I also use ‘open hand, inviting’ gestures as Sylvester when in a comfortable talking state (with friends).
Some other independent data on the ‘look’ :
http://www.socionics.com/prof/infp.htm
http://www.socionics.com/prof/intp.htm
http://www.socionics.com/prof/intj.htm
http://www.socionics.com/prof/infj.htm

Introvert Intuitives:

INFP
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=64L0C4uPJ0I&NR=1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8RAq_JjEXQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkSocWYJajU
-wry smile, shy shrug, pretend ‘glazed’ look (when in discomfiting crowded places). mostly about eyebrows and eyes or corners of mouth. Friendly eyes, shy gestures. rambling, likes to share about self

INTP
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxkN6BiBMKs&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pE00aX5wzZo&feature=related
-between eyebrow frown, lift of eyebrows to emphasis points(not as often as infp), deliberative speech, reserved, suppressed smile

INTJ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZ2G-LWGtPc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRIFI69FpX4
-minimal eyebrow (if at all), deliberate lengthy speech(no pauses), more away head movement than independent face movement, avoid eye contact

INFJ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uDUr1Bdn8w
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwnLvxZH8Ws&feature=related
-exasperated sighs , lots of head movement (maybe, maybe not), escaping attention, ironic grin/smile, one eyebrow lift, rambling speech

I don’t think I captured that very well. Anyway, I’m pretty much guessing cause there were only so few videos (& most being intuitives). I think I might look up the extroverts next. Those are pretty interesting too- esp the ENFPs and ENTPs..:)

I got a job!

Yeah! I got me a job! After waiting out weeks for my medical checkup to clear, I am finally given the go-ahead to start my job next week..! JOY! For reasons of privacy, all I can say its a communications job that will utilise my schooling. It’s been a long long 9 mths of sporadic unemployment. I had to work in so many degrading temp jobs that I thought my future was going to be like that: a series of faceless jobs in organisations that take you and and spit you out.

Well, it seems I still have a small storehouse of universal luck out there, somewhere. Someone has been donating to it..:) I actually rejected a better paying, closer job because of it. Let’s hope I’m right to do that.

the disclaimer

I have been ruminating upon this thought: the inclination of myself to order people in boxes. It is starting not to seem right to me. One does not need to define others in order to define oneself. Or such terms as ‘the others’. Label and you will be labelled. I think I may need to place a footnote: that such things as Myer-Briggs, as astrology, as divisions, are for the understanding of self, and the self need not be taken seriously.

INFP & Photography

hmm. why would this is one of the most searched terms. seems like many infps out there want to get into photography. I’ve worked in a photography studio, so I will try to provide some observations:

My photography experience

‘IN’ are a rare bunch. If you do find them in photography, one thing you would notice more about them is how they are global thinkers, preferring to focus on a theme. They might do themes of loneliness, feelings without being aware of it. Many are highly talented. They love the camera. It is sometimes hard to tell the ‘IN’ from ‘IS’ but one good way of telling is when giving a subject, do they go all out and create ideas, putting in countless influences, with less thought for technique? As photographer assistants they are the types with many interesting ideas who may have a tendency to daydream on set. They can be lazy with technique, unless trained. One INFP photographer I knew always had the sets with the most fun as people brought in props and contributed to ideas so that the shoot evolved in a very naturalistic and humorous way.

‘IS’ are found by layers inhabiting the terra as photographer assistants. One thing about them is their concentration and deep appreciation for technical details. While ‘IN’ may gloss over the technique (unless they are highly skilled professional photographers or been given a good vocational training), ‘IS’ are very at home with reading what needs to be carried around next, fixed, etc. However, one sees a tendency in their photos to be ’safe’, ‘repetitive’, ’stubborn’ once they have developed their craft to a point they say, its ok to not change anymore. ‘IS’ sometimes hate thinking about ideas and would delegate it. One photographer I knew, despite given deadlines to think of ideas, inevitably turned to people around them and asked for ideas on the shoot itself.

‘EN’ are quite creative, although there is a limit if they have to handle all the minor details on set. They would rather focus on the ideas and being behind the lens than dealing with the techniques or subjects. This is not to say they are poor technically. They can be highly skilled and their photos show interesting thought processes at work. They are also very good at dealing with people and tend to be the favored photo assistant.

‘ES’- none that I met so far.

I believe INFPs, while tend to show natural endowments in photography, normally hit a roadblock in their knowledge unless they are willing to be tested in an ’sensor’ environment to develop lighting and technical skills. They would usually rather consider the emotional centre of the image than fuss with the lights. This can result in some brilliantly shot images, but woe if the sky turns dark. They probably be happy shooting photos for stock, competitions, photojournalism or event shoots. ‘IS’ types would love product, events, architecture shoots where they can repeat themselves within their skill knowledge. However, a well-trained INFP could potentially enter fields that are ‘EN’ playgrounds: fashion or portraiture, although they probably need a good producer to talk away the crew or subjects who would want a piece of his time as he could overextend himself.

Things an INFP would need to look out for

The kind of environment- can she take the catty crowded atmosphere of fashion? I’m talking about a party of 20 people and above. She will need to direct people and please capricious clients. Or would they be happier doing photojournalism, tagging along with the reporter?
Their technical ability- photographers are expected to make snap decisions on the lights if things like: light blows out, image looks dark, an imminent deadline. INFP would be expected to direct the crew, which they may not be used to, as there might be no time to discuss decisions.
Developing their portfolio- would be essential for the INFP to make contacts with clients. This would require they be more proactive in self-promotion, talking to potential clients and subjects on set rather than day-dreaming. However, an INFP can convince people by wowing them with a wonderful portfolio, letting pictures do the talking. But first they need to make contact.
Surrounding themselves with positive people- admittedly, being your own boss or freelancer can be very tough. One learns things about people one would rather not learn. Selfishness, idiocy, cattiness might be part and parcel of the kind the media attracts. So its rather important for INFPs to have a good mentor or someone they can share these problems with.

Feel free to add on.

INFP or ISFP or UFO?

Dear readers, before you read this post: I think my post is highly misleading, unless if one were to read the message board which I posted the link : http://infp.globalchatter.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?t=219 and you would understand that I was trying to figure out if i were an ISFP or INFP! lol. Not saying if INFPs were better than ISFPs or UFOs.

Sorry for the misdirection.

I realised this is not the first time.. haha;) – 22mar09
—————————————————————————————————–

damn. I do hate this. all because of a small remark…clearing brain of clutter. *shakes head. Ok, a quote from http://infp.globalchatter.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?t=219:
>>> *are my own
Here are some of the differences I’ve noticed…

While both are drawn to beauty, ISFPs see it more in the physical/sensual world; they focus more on the form, the color, the sound, the overall look, while INFPs focus more on the meanings, the feelings, the symbolism, etc. >>*I focused on the infp style in my early years, but learnt the isfp style the past 5 years. DRAW.

As Artisans, ISFPs mainly pursue pleasure of the senses, and aren’t overly concerned with what scruples may get in the way of other types; they live for the moment and go after what they want, often regardless of the consequences or how others might feel about it. INFPs have desires and enjoy pleasure, but they tend to place lofty ideals at a greater priority. >>*er? pleasure of senses. haha infp wins this round

ISFPs tend to be much more in tune with their bodies, and love physical activities – you often see them hiking, mountainclimbing, swimming, playing a sport, and dancing. INFPs tend to live life more in their heads. >>* i think this would really depend right? but infp wins.

With their eye for physical beauty, I think ISFPs tend to dress sexy, “cool”, at the very least in a way that they know makes them attractive, while INFPs generally give very little thought to their outward appearance (“If you’re judging me by the way I look, then you’re shallow.”). >>*geez, not all infp are slobs! isfp wins.

In conversation, ISFPs mainly stick to “real world” topics – places, things, people they know, events that happened, things people did or said, etc. I’ve found that when I as an INFP get abstract and start talking about religion, philosophy, or speaking in metaphors, the ISFP usually furrows their brow and looks like they’re trying to decipher a foreign language, or like they’re thinking: “and remind me, again, why this is interesting?” Smile>>*infp wins.

And in my experience ISFPs can be very quiet, and very difficult to get to know. While an INFP will talk your ear off if they sense that you want to try to know and understand them, or are interested in their thoughts, ISFPs generally don’t like to talk much at all, preferring to keep their thoughts and feelings private. They mainly prefer to communicate through their actions, and through their “arts”, and enjoy people’s company through shared experiences.>>*infp wins, although i do like crafts, you know.

score:
infp -5
isfp -2

The Primary Processes of INFP

Hope you can bear with me, since I think better in writing out.
from :http://www.cognitiveprocesses.com/16types.html

The Primary Processes
The Leading Role (Dominant) (sometimes referred to as the 1st function)
The process that plays the leading role is the one that usually develops early in childhood. We tend to engage in this process first, trusting it to solve our problems and help us be successful.
-for an INFP this is Fi (introverted feeling), an internal compass of feeling about people and things.

The Supporting Role (Auxiliary) (sometimes referred to as the 2nd function)
The supporting role is how we are helpful to others as well as supportive of ourselves. Once we have developed some facility with our leading role process, we are more likely to feel comfortable engaging in our supporting role process.
-for an INFP this is Ne (extraverted intuiting), noticing internal meanings or behavior thus shaping results into an interesting possibility

The Relief Role (Tertiary) (sometimes referred to as the 3rd function)
The relief role gives us a way to energize and recharge ourselves. It serves as a backup to the supporting role and often works in tandem with it. Usually, in young adulthood we are attracted to activities that draw upon this process. The relief role often is how we express our creativity.
-for an INFP this is Si (introverted sensing), storing details from the past to compare with current events

The Aspirational Role (Inferior) (sometimes referred to as the 4th function)
The aspirational role usually doesn’t develop until around midlife. We often experience it first in its negative aspect of projecting our “shoulds,” fears, and negativities onto others. Often our sense of purpose, inspiration, and ideals have the qualities of the process that plays this role.
-for an INFP this is Te (extroverted thinking), which helps us easily follow someone else’s logic or organization

INFP migrating over to INFJ ..??

Been wondering if i’m a bona fide INFP. ok here goes again…..blahhhhhhhhhh.

http://www.humanmetrics.com/ -INFJ (1% J)
http://www.kisa.ca/ -INFP (64, 77, 60, 59%)
http://www.metarasa.com/resources/ -INFJ (72%), INFP(68%)
http://www.41q.com/ -INFJ (1 mark over for ‘J’)
http://www.mypersonality.info/ -INFP (see my other page)

hmmmm. seems i am migrating to INFJ territory sooner than I thought. I have been quite moderate these few years. Partially due to myraid of influences from extroverts, thinkers, sensors and now even judgers (i never thought so, the ESTJ types) , I have become more open to other ways of being, if one should say.

I believe there was once instance in the past 7 years when I went over into INFJ but that never repeated itself again as much as INFP. Well, if I do migrate, then I would probably have to discontinue this site. Would not be fair to mislead people. However, shall have to repeat this test again. Perhaps 6 months down the road I would have gone over to INTP or INTJ(gads! ok i can stand INTJs these days but seriously..) haha…:)

It’s like how they say, age can mellow someone. I know I will never really venture into ‘E’ , or ‘S’, but some of the people I respect are the good ‘ES’ types. My mum can sure keep the dishes cleaned, the clothes washed come rain or shine. Funnily enough, when I was younger I used to awed by ‘INFJ’ types, but these days the types I am awed are the ‘ENF’ types. Sometimes you idealise who you like to be.

Happiness & Money

Money and Happiness. In regarding money and happiness, we raise questions of a philosophical bent. Can money relate to our pursuit of happiness? Many people, when asked why they do not pursue their interests, cite reasons as finances. Money is understood in such forms:

1)Stability: money to pay the bills, children education, groceries, emergencies
2)Enjoyment: money for movies, music and holidays
3)Luxury: money for spending on branded goods, expensive jewelry, fine dining trips to exotic places, buying art

Does spending for enjoyment and luxury make us happy?
Most will agree that to be contented, one must be able to fulfill the financial obligations of bills/debts and day-to-day expenses. But it is harder to say having money to spend on items of enjoyment or luxury correlates to our feeling of well-being.

Buying for enjoyment only gives short-term boost
For instance, on a shopping trip, you spy the iPhone or a dress that is listed as the ‘hottest new look’ in Vogue. You figure out you have the cash, and its Christmas/bonus and just the right time to ‘reward’ yourself by buying into the hype and getting something that a few million people around the world might carry or wear so you can be the ‘hottest’ and most popular person on the planet as people run over and ask about your iPhone or ask you for tips on dressing. You grin from ear to ear for a matter of a few weeks or so (maybe even just a day), and then, you’ll be displaced by the next person with the next hype. In a matter of a few months, you find that your iPhone isn’t giving you the satisfaction you thought you’ll be having: a breakdown here and an inconvenience there. You decide to dump that ‘hot’ dress back into the wardrobe. Lesson? Using money to buy your enjoyment can give you a boost of self-esteem and popularity, but you will have to keep shopping or entertaining yourself. Isn’t that tedious?

Buy luxury for long term enjoyment if you can afford
How about using money to buy luxury items? We all know buying luxury items means: buying something that is exquisitely handmade, or lasts for a lifetime, brings repeat enjoyment, or is a status distributor (you from the lower/povertyline/middleclass). For instance, buying a grand old trip to see the Northern Lights or a helicopter trip at the Arctic. Something you’ll only afford once a lifetime, and an challenging experience. Or customising a crafted handmade leather luggage from one of the luxury houses, which ends up as something that you might even pass on to your child. Or an expensive vintage car, circa pre-war. Yet the thing with luxury items is, because of their difficulty in obtaining them, for many people they remain out of reach, even though their lifetime enjoyment is higher. Lesson? Buy luxury if you can afford to invest (not splurge). However, does it mean since we cannot afford luxury items.. we should try to still work towards getting them?

Don’t need to obsess over what you don’t have
In thinking of the future enjoyment (remember you have not obtained the good), you are starting to give too much emphasis of the immediate gratification you will get when you obtain the item. For most people, a feeling (instinct) of future feelings does not translate to the same feelings in that future. In other words, you can’t predict your happiness.So if you can not afford something like that, it is best to tell oneself: it is just a trip/bag/painting, I’ll take it as it comes, but no need to obsess over something I do not have.

In my opinion, money relates to happiness in these ways:
1)Money enough for stability >contentment
2)Money put aside for luxury > long term low key happiness: which we can do in minute dose/without
3)Money put aside for enjoyment> short term high hey happiness: which we can most do in small doses

I believe that once you get past the stage of having money for stability and small amount of enjoyment or luxury, there is no need to keep adding on (materialism). One hears of people simplifying their lives in their 40s, going for minimalism, stop buying clothes. This is a innate wisdom that age brings, we only need so much money for materialism in our lives. And by that age, we probably understand the things that make us happy, more than money.

Happiness & Flow

The idea of ‘flow’ first intrigued me through a popular game, ‘The Sims’. The players in the game, having achieved an objective in their hobby, will enter something called ‘The Zone’, in which a white halo will descend around the player. It was a strange idea I had not been exposed to, and I began to search the internet for information relating to it, coming upon the term, ‘Flow’.

‘ A life of many activities in flow is likely to be a life of great satisfaction’.
Flow has been identified in a happiness study as one of the things that make us happy.

Thru Wikipedia (admit it, i’m lazy to search books.)Positive psychologist Csíkszentmihályi the identifies the following as accompanying an experience of flow:

1. Clear goals
2. Concentrating and focusing, a high degree of concentration on a limited field of attention
3. A loss of the feeling of self-consciousness
4. One’s subjective experience of time is altered.
5. Direct and immediate feedback
6. Balance between ability level and challenge
7. A sense of personal control over the situation or activity.
8. The activity is intrinsically rewarding, so there is an effortlessness of action.

In a way, Flow requires depth, a task that is difficult but that one has mastery over, no interruptions and which generates a end product or feedback loop. Probably this is what people talk about as ‘passion’ or ‘hobby’. Remember the last time you had flow in your life? You were probably quite happy..:)

What was it? Gardening (with your shoes muddy and your hair askew, but so happily digging), Reading (a great comic or poet, your eyes shinning), Running (the last time you’ll ever run in that ratty shoes and stained shirt, but boy were you euphoric!)…

self-mosiac

Here’s how you play: link from cynthia

a. Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search.
b. Using only the first page, pick an image.
c. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into fd’s Mosaic Maker.

The Questions (with my answers):

1. What is your first name? ling
2. What is your favorite food? bun
3. What is your favorite color? cerise (or pink)
4. Favorite drink? water (green tea)
5. Dream vacation? greece (prolly by looking at great pictures in books though, lol)
6. Favorite Hobby? reading (well, she was reading until she went to sleep. i love my bedtime reading)
7. What you want to be when you grow up? poet (by the time i’m 55 mayb haha)
8. What do you love most in life? sun (where the temperature is above 22deg and sun shines)
9. One word to describe you. thinker

Things that are liberating..

Have you ever…
try to dance, even though you would attract laughs?
try to make a rude joke, though you are not be sure if its funny?
try to be more of a show-off, even it goes against your wallflower state?
try to manipulate people you didn’t like, though you didn’t want to do it?
try to learn something technical and really practical, although you are clumsy?
try to be drunk and talk crazy, even as you are self-conscious?
try to be affectionate and touch others, though you feel like holding back?
try to dress in a crazy standout way, even others think it looks weird?
try to talk to a stranger, though you know not what to say?
try to go after your dreams, not knowing how it would work out?
try to smoke like a chimney and smell as bad, knowing its bad for you?

try it someday.

The nasty side of being an INFP

I think INFPs tend of them of themselves in really pretty terms: idealistic, romantics, sweet. Well, this airy-fairy, poor babe in the woods image is kinda of a misjudgement cause, INFPs are really:

1)pretty narcissistic or selfcentred
2)irritatingly whiny and unable to give an opinion
3)tend to not make an effort in relationships
4)like things that are so esoteric nobody can make a conversation with them
5)sarcastic about things and too deprecating about themselves

-Visting INFPs forums and comparing them to say, INFJ forums, one can see an underlying, communistic pride which we judge harshly those different from our worldview. e.g. we are hurt by so-and-so from this type. I am probably guilty of such bias from time to time. We think people set out to hurt our feelings when they probably are more bothered with their own feelings (universal law).

-INFPs, in their not so mature teenhood, are irritatingly whiny over matters like people’s feelings, ethics. This can drive people mad cause sometimes leaders just want ideas that propel the project. You can try to encourage INFPs to speak up but they will either give you a ‘rabbit in headlights’ look or be stubbornly agreeable with everyone.

-INFPs tend to let more active friends decide on what to do, eat, or even frequency of contact. This can cause relationships to destruct from: boredom, lack of contact. Friends can go crazy trying to get an INFP to reply to an meeting. Lazers..

-INFPs, like all introvert intuitives, have hobbies that are so arty farty (one INFP ever told me he liked only non-famous bands, and did not like them when others knew about them), exotic (astrology, plamistry, MYER-BRIGGS haha, weird ways of piercing one’s anatomy) or so technical (programming, sound engineering, weird conspiracies) that other types don’t know how to respond to us.

-how can being deprecating be bad? well, for starters, not everybody thinks its a good thing as it can be a mark of low confidence. And being sarcastic can be INFPs way of dealing with authority or the world they perceive as harsh. Say something nasty that gets their goat, and watch the claws come out. One morose INFP I’ve know have quibbled on people’s dressing and their behaviour, marking out some loud, sociable girls as ‘cheerleaders’. I laughed at it cause it was funny in a way only INXX would understand.

But all being said, I still like being an INFP (rarely you would find one who hates being one anyway).

What do bosses think about you, INFP?

Hmm, been thinking about the bosses I had in the past…

ESFP: They have a lively. supportive way of working, making the work place a very enthusiastic and humorous place where actual work gets done. Probably tend to think of introverts as ‘thinking, worrying, quiet, hardworking individuals’ and would tend to ask them if they are alright.

ENTJ: Philosphical and sharp-thinking, they do allow for a great deal of flexibility, especially in minor boring details which they do not want to think about. Probably tend to think of INFPs as ’smart, creative hardworking employees’, who need a bit of direction and practical teaching.

ENFJ: Personable and warm, they do not like to make employees do stuff they may not enjoy even though they are the bosses. Creates a flexible and enthusiastic workplace. Probably thinks of INFPs as ‘possible hardworking understudies’ which they can thrive in their mentor role. However, may not like criticism on projects they enjoy which they perceive personally.

ESFJ: Organised and rather motivated to control, they do not like criticism and do make the workplace a rather uncertain place. On one hand they can be enthusiastic and warm, then suddenly turn into manipulative and critical. Probably thinks of INFPs as ‘undecided, talented but weak’, which they need to change or encourage without thinking of consequences.

INTJ: Organised to a highly regimental way, they are sharp and critical but also easy to please when employees fall within their directions. Makes the workplace a place where critical discussions are allowed as they do not take things personally. Probably tend to think of INFPs as ‘hardworking and creative’ but ‘disappointing’ because of their high standards.

ISFJ: Organised and critical of themselves, they are however warm people. Allows a warm, sedate environment to thrive. However, they can be quite sensitive to perceived criticism. Probably thinks of INFPs as ‘undisciplined, creative but critical’ individuals which they need to help or they will fall apart in their own mess.

I guess my favourites are: ESFP (humorous) , ENTJ (natural leadership, the ‘N’ helps)
not favourites: ESFJ (manipulative) , INTJ (high standards)

How about you..?

Job search depression

There are two things in the world that frightens people most: poverty and loneliness. I think loneliness, the sense of not having someone you can pour your heart out to and be accepted, is worse than poverty. Ever had the sense of talking and nobody listens?

Had a very bad day. Let all the demons of fear and anxiety rear up and ran rampant. All the same, I reminded myself not to talk in symbols and futures, and instead spoke out my feelings in a straight forward manner to my worried/annoyed family. No more beating around the bush for this infp anymore. I suspect this will do me good. Still, my breakdown comes after a long time of mild depressed state. (the kind where you lose all feelings of wanting to be social, interesting or funny- and you’re just holding up the fort on a day to day basis, & even stuff you like don’t make it better)

I know I should really do some exercise, or make changes to diet and keep on doing stuff like reframing stuff positively, or even go to church- but part of me wants to wallow in this state until I find a job. It’s like I want to prove to myself even at this state, at least my career end holds up. Unfortunately I don’t know if I have used up all my positive luck in this world. I am in a state of horrible stasis. Really, I wouldn’t know my way until a bush bursts into flames into front of me and there’s a big blinking Vegas type arrow towards the right decision.

INFP or INTP?

I believe this problem as been debated to death elsewhere. Kudos to this thread: http://forums.intpcentral.com/showthread.php?t=2406

quote CreativeChaos (INFP):”The weakest point with the “T” for me (and this is stated in descriptions I’ve read) is that it is very difficult for me to NOT take things personally in my “real” word. It is difficult for me to be “objective” when it comes to relationships, period.”

quote Birdnest(INFP):”Yes, I think you can develop analytical thought and drop some feeling if it doesn’t help you along the way, or learn to express feeling more under certain circumstances that might not have been there before. I think you can round yourself out by adapting more of one or another types, but that your core is probably still the same underneath. “

I kinda think I am an ‘INFP’ when: I write in paragraphs, and go on rambling. I kinda of believe I was a pretty strong ‘F’ when I was younger and really emotional. Used to daydream a lot, loved reading imaginative fantasy (still do: except now I like magic realism and Patrick O’Brian), liked poetry. I probably didn’t use much ‘T’ or rational behavior until I was 19 or so. Cried all the time when young over stuff like sad guitar songs or just being spoken sternly to. Read horoscopes in the past but sticks to religion now. Like films from Wim Wenders. I become very emotional in relationships.. drinking more brings out my ‘F’ and smoking tendencies. I type as an INFP if i search for my feelings. (i’m 53% ‘F’) I use too many smilies and ‘..hmmm’s.

I kinda think I am an ‘INTP’ when: I structure my thoughts, and rationalise decisions after being unable to use ‘gut instinct’ to decide. I help ‘F’ people see the side of ‘T’ people..lol! seems like I do understand them. I still daydream, but I spend loads of time analysing and second-guessing myself using the web. I used to read bad science fiction from Asimov and read new scientist when young(hehe), and I love reading film criticism or listening to a good critical analysis. Like films from David Lynch. I am still pretty sane when drunk… I type as a INTP when I think of my working style. I write, ‘I think’ often.

someone also said that most females who can’t figure out are probably INTPs because of the social stigma associated with being a ‘T’. I do remember a few years back thinking I should use more thought so I could survive better in school. Could also be the case I am developing my inferior extraverted thinking (Te) as a result of acknowledging its usefulness in life. To be honest, I don’t know which I am.. don’t really want to settle it now. Could this be also typical of an INXP?