Eric wrote this in far earlier but I only had time to publish it today, what with my life being slightly hectic. I really enjoyed Eric’s post as I particularly like reading about INFPs in ‘un-infpy’ types of occupations- like science, engineering, sales- it challenges me to understand that we are a varied lot, with varied interests.
Eric is a Software Engineer.
I like what Eric says here: “To me life is all about the possibilities and the potential of what people and things can be. “
This resounds with a quote I found recently: “What lies hiding within each object? A garden, so to speak.” ~Philip K Dick
Thank you Eric.
(E: all highlights below in post are my additions)
image attribution: http://www.flickr.com/photos/geopelia/132670857/
Name : Eric
Age : 25
Topic : My Life as an INFP
I always liked the title “The Idealist” that is sometimes used to describe INFPs because I feel like that may explain why I do crazy things from time to time.
Just to give a basic outline of who I am, I’m currently employed as a Software Engineer, I’m strong follower of Christ, and I live in my own home with four roommates.
Somedays I think it is very ironic that I’m employed as an engineer as I’m not naturally a detailed person, nor do I have the typical engineer attitude of wanting to stay to myself. I think what helps me be good at my job is the fact that I have a perfectionist mindset and that drives me to become more detailed than I would naturally be.
Though I do admit that being engineer is probably not the ideal job for me because I spend most of my day in an office alone, when I’d really rather be dealing with helping people individually with their problems.
It’s hard to serve a computer screen full of code. Though my job does allow me to be creative at times as I also am in charge of user interface design, so I believe that gives me just enough of a fix to balance out my work life.
My life outside of work, is basically all about people. From time to time, I try to take up different hobbies, but I find the one I am most consistent at is spending time with people over a coffee, or some dinner, just hearing about what they are going through.
I have somewhat of a low opinion of myself, which is different than a negative opinion, because I do not think bad things about myself, but rather I think I’m only a very small piece of the bigger picture of life. That is why I’m always a bit surprised when I find out if some girl “likes” me or if someone regards my opinion highly.
I’m not sure if this is common with other INFPs but over the last several years of my life ( probably around when I turned 18 ) I started learning how to be an extrovert in certain situations to be able to better connect with people. Typically though it is just a disguise because it takes a lot of energy for me to become an extrovert and I’m very exhausted at the end of any extroverted type activity.
There are two things, that I as being an INFP need to specifically work on. First off is dealing with conflict.
I extremely dislike conflict, and I know, I know, most people do not, but I feel as if I have a special dislike for conflict. I hardly am ever honest about if something somebody says to me is offensive. I usually just shrug it off and try to laugh, and maybe try to rework the words in my mind to think about all the possibilities of what someone “could have” meant instead of thinking about what they actually said.
When someone breaks a promise to me, I rarely ever call them out on it, I usually just say “it’s ok” and move on. Though now that I own a house and have four roommates, I’m slowly learning how to be better at dealing with conflict, because it seems like every day there is some responsibility that someone has forgotten to do or some issue somebody else is having another person in the house.
Through the process of being the landlord and head of the household I’m learning that conflict is necessary at times because people must be held to a standard to improve in their lives and if I’m always avoiding conflict with others I’m not helping them improve in their own lives.
Second thing I need to work on, is letting go.
I cannot tell you how many friends that I have that do not care to talk to me, or at least have lost interest in me but I still call them and leave them a voice mail every few months just to see how they are doing.They may not even respond to several of my voicemails in a row, but I will keep leaving them voice mails.
I was involved in long distance relationship with a girl for over five years and after some conflicts with our values I decided to “let go” and even though it has been almost two years since I have seen her, I still ponder from time to time, if letting go was the right choice, even though I was confident in the decision that I made.
I really hate the words “goodbye” I avoid thinking that those words are actually real sometimes.
One last thought about my day to day life. To me life is all about the possibilities and the potential of what people and things can be. I can never drive over a bridge, or enter a building, or do anything “normal” without thinking that there is more to this moment than meets the eye.
I picture my life and the lives of those around me as the most exciting story ever! Though, at times it gets me in trouble as I think of stuff playing out like a perfect movie where everything works out and there is a magical moment when everything makes sense, but somedays are just not like that and that’s always the struggle to be ok with the normal.
As I often like to quote from one of my favorite songs “Reality is a lovely place, but I wouldn’t want to live there.”
Anyways to wrap all of this up, I enjoy being who I am, and like I said previously, somedays I do think I’m a bit crazy to have all the ideals that I do have, but I think its worth it because life does have purpose and to find that purpose is the best thing in the world!
Thanks for listening to me